How To Spot A Psychopath

June 19, 2007

Crucifixion howdy!

Filed under: Spam, Language, Scams

To continue my occasional series on Words (And Word Combinations) Found Only In Spam, allow me to submit “Calvary Greetings”.

I’ve had many “Calvary Greetings” 419 messages, and just got my very own copy of the “Lady Victoria Amin” version.

Apparently “Calvary Greetings” is actually a normal, if somewhat gruesome, salutation among some African Christians. This explains its popularity as protective colouration for those who hope to break the Eighth, or possibly Seventh, Commandment.

Since people in the English-speaking world don’t typically receive a lot of mail from pious Africans, though, “Calvary Greetings” currently stands as an almost perfectly reliable indicator of scam-spam.

6 Comments »

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  1. Dan, you owe me one keyboard cleaning. "Crucifixion Howdy" resulted in coffee exiting my nose.

    Ouch, by the way.

    It also resulted in my boss wondering what in the blazes was wrong with me as I simultaneosuly tried to laugh, sneeze, yelp and cry. S'ok though... my sinuses needed a caffeine jolt.....

    Comment by Stark — June 20, 2007 @ 4:20 am

  2. > It also resulted in my boss wondering what in
    > the blazes was wrong with me as I simultaneosuly
    > tried to laugh, sneeze, yelp and cry

    You probably just need to add some salt.

    Comment by Daniel Rutter — June 20, 2007 @ 6:46 am

  3. Incidentally, the funniest thing I've witnessed in the last week - heck, the last month - is the "power converters" gag in the Robot Chicken Star Wars Special, which people who missed it can find at their favourite hive of P2P scum and villainy.

    There were some other hits in the Special, if you ask me - including the widely-YouTubed-for-months-now Palpatine-on-the-phone-to-Vader bit - but the power converters gag all by itself would, in my opinion, make the Special worth viewing three times.

    Comment by Daniel Rutter — June 20, 2007 @ 6:52 am

  4. I think I'll stick to drinking my caffeine... although the instant kick of pure nasal caffeine might be fun in meetings. And rush hour traffic.

    Robot Chicken Star Wars is one of those things that is far funnier than the sum of it's parts.

    Comment by Stark — June 20, 2007 @ 7:51 am

  5. This morning's non-sequiturs, courtesy of the spambox:

    crispy short order cook
    moldy mating ritual
    my saxon be yuck
    surly dust bunny

    The mind boggles...

    Comment by g-lock — June 20, 2007 @ 11:02 am

  6. I smell a spamusement...

    Comment by Jax184 — June 20, 2007 @ 12:40 pm

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